Give a little bit of your love...

A string of pearls.  Theme dinner at a friend's house.  A kitten.  An Ipod.  Four things that seem to have absolutely nothing in common, right?  The thing that ties these items together is that each one brought a young person closer to strengthening his or her spiritual life.  How, you might ask/  These are all examples of things that have been up for grabs at the annual youth auction over the past several years.

I was fortunate to be a part of the first J2A pilgrimage at Trinity.  For those who don't know, part of the Journey to Adulthood curriculum is a pilgrimage to grow in spirituality and step outside one's comfort zone.  For many young people, it's their first trip out of the country or without their families.  For me it was both.

Our class traveled to Taize, France and Liverpool, England on our journey.  We were a small but brave bunch, none more so than our fearless leaders Mark and Kathy Shackelford and our relatively new rector, Fr. McKee.  The eight of us boarded a plane from Tulsa to Chicago and then we were off to France.  Honestly, I was terrified.  I had been away from my family before. But, I had never flown across the ocean or without my parents.  Even though I had known six of the eight people for a majority of my life, this was uncharted territory.

When we arrived in Taize, a monastic community in the French countryside which hosts thousands of young people every year, it was hot.  And we were jet lagged.  And hungry.  Your typical whiny American teenagers.  Or I'm sure that's what everyone thought.  But soon we got into the groove of things.  Emma and I joined a small group with other young people from across the globe, where we spent our time talking about our beliefs and why we believe them.  Stephanie, Matt and Gareth, being over the age of 16, were assigned "jobs" as service to the community.  We attended church several times a day and had time to reflect.

If you've never been to a Taize service at Trinity, go.  That is the closest you can get to being there without hopping on a plane.  Except there's air conditioning.  And seats.  Overall, what I took away most from my time in Taize was a stronger conviction in my beliefs.  The realization that I believed what I did because I really believed- not because my parents did or my church told me to- was the greatest gift I received from Taize.

The trip to Liverpool brought us closer to our roots.  We visited cathedrals and castles and stayed with the friendly and generous parishioners of McKee family friend Ray.  They taught us about our heritage in way you can't learn by reading it in a book.  We also had a lot of fun.  We toured more than one soccer stadium, toured the Beatles museum and engaged in a laughter filled scavenger hunt.  The memories I made on my J2A are ones I will cherish for a lifetime.  And I know that every young person who has gone on the four pilgrimages since mine would tell you the same thing.  While there are plenty of silly stories that we all could share, the lasting effects are to our spiritual health.  Our pilgrimages have made us spiritually stronger.

None of the last five pilgrimages could have taken place without the support of parishioners.  The support of Trinity allows a expensive trip to be a little less of a burden for families.  This summer's pilgrimage will take our 9th and 10th graders on a journey to Italy, where they will discover some of our Christian faith's oldest communities.  They are going to travel to Rome, Assisi and Florence to learn from the earliest Christians and learn about themselves along the way.

So how can you help?  Buy some awesome stuff at the youth auction on March 6th.  If you want a sneak peek at the goods, they will have an auction preview at the annual Mardi Gras party on March 5th.  There are always great items and some fabulous dinners and events to purchase.  And you can feel good about your new Vera Bradley bag or your weekend at the lake with the knowledge that by treating yourself, you are helping shape a young person's faith experience.  Pretty sweet deal, yeah?  And think of it this way, if you have children, some day they will be in J2A and planning a pilgrimage.  So pay it forward.

                                                  Ready or not, Europe, here we come!

                                               Spending time with new friends at Taize.

Inch by inch

Ordinary. That is what we commonly call the season of the church calendar we are currently in. We have celebrated the beautiful and mysterious season of Christ's birth and we are awaiting the holy and reverent season of Lent. So, ordinary-- nothing special, right? There's no, pageantry or stories of mystical guys appearing in a flash of blinding light.

But consider this, in the roughly three months between Epiphany and Ash Wednesday, we will cover 33 years of Jesus' life. Imagine condensing 33 years of your life into 12 weeks. It may not seem like a difficult task but let's take sometime to think about what Christ accomplished in 33 years. The first 30 or so years of Jesus' life are a mystery aside from his trip to the temple at the age of 12. So that's easy. But then there was the wedding at Cana-- Jesus first miracle. It didn't make big waves at the time. The next step is to John the Baptist, a formidable force in his time, baptizing Jesus in the Jordan River and God descending as a dove to proclaim Jesus as his beloved son. People start to talk about this new prophet. Was he who he said? Or would he be like all the others? Quickly, Jesus gains followers, performs miracles, preaches God's word. Soon he'll be labeled as a rebel by those in authority. Dangerous. A heretic. They begin to call him teacher, as do his followers, but not out of respect. Rather, they mock him.

Jesus starts to reveal more to his closest followers. That he is more than a prophet, he is the lamb of God and will be the ultimate sacrifice. That his time on Earth is limited. That they need to learn all they can and grow with him so they can carry on once he has left his mortal self behind. They need to GROW. Like a mustard seed. Have the faith of a child, whose faith is limitless.

When my mom taught Sunday school several years ago, we also referred to growing time. Green, the color used during this season, is a symbol for growth. It's a time for all of us to remind ourselves what the foundation of our faith is. The big events are essential to our faith but the teachings of Jesus are what make us who we truly are. We can look to those lessons in times of struggle and joy. They give us reassurance and comfort. When we have questions, these are stories are far from ordinary. They are extraordinary.

Seems a shame to cram it all in to to three months doesn't it? But instead of rushing through it, let's take this time to grow in our faith. Sit down with your families and read the words of Jesus. The words that he lived. It make make things seem a little less ordinary.

It's what Christmas means to me, my love

Here's a brief history of the life and times of Ashley Haggard.  In my short 25 years, I have celebrated a Colonial Christmas, a New York Christmas, a Christmas I can't remember and experienced the winter holidays of my friends.  However, 22 of my 25 Christmases have been spent in the blessed halls of Trinity Episcopal Church.  And I wouldn't want it any other way.

To me, Trinity offers what Christmas is all about.  From the greenery and candles to the carols and brass to the traditional Christmas Eucharist and the chance to ring in the Christmas season with people I have known my whole life.  One Christmas event has, as many could guess, shaped me more than any other.  The first time I experienced the Children's Pageant at Trinity I was three years old.  I don't remember that Christmas but my mother does, and by the next year I was standing up front with my halo and wings just like all the other little angels.  And I never looked back.  From the age of three until I was in the eighth grade, my family didn't miss a single pageant.  I have played every part from angel to inn keeper's wife to Mary (the highlight of any little girl's pageant experience).  By the time I was 9, I could quote you the entire pageant, line for line.

As a child, the pageant is what brought Christmas to life for me.  While my friends pretended to be elves or Maria from the Nutcracker, I was practicing my perfect angel posture.  While they waited on pins and needles for "Jingle Bells", I couldn't wait until it was time for "O Come All Ye Faithful" and "Once in a royal City David".  The Christmas story as told through the pageant both old and the newer rendition we started using a few years ago, allows children to take center stage in the liturgy and become fully immersed in what Christmas really means.

Don't get me wrong, my family firmly believes in the power of Santa.  My grandmother's name was Virginia after all.  But when my family prepares for Christmas, instead of sugar plums, we see visions of angels, shepherds and a little wooden donkey named Bueford (didn't know he had a name did ya?).  That is my family's way of celebrating the birth of the Christ child.  For many Trinity families, the pageant is a part of their holiday traditions too.  Whether you have children currently in the pageant or your children are grown and you look back fondly on those Christmases past, it's a part of the Spirit of Christmas.

Every family has their own traditions, mine is a little different than most.  In 2003, I asked if I could help with the Christmas pageant.  By 2004, I was the new director.  For the past six years, my family and I have spent our Advent season preparing the best Christmas pageant we could for Trinity as our way of thanking you all for everything Trinity has given to us.  And I wouldn't have it any other way.  Over the last two decades, there have been new scripts and characters, new sets and costumes, but the heart of the pageant has always remained the same- "And behold, I bring you good tidings of great Joy.  Today in the City of David is born to you a Savior; he is Christ the Lord."

From the Haggard Family, Merry Christmas and thank you for your love and support.  And whatever service you attend this Christmas or however you chose to spend it, celebrate tradition and love and good tidings of great joy.

                          

Tis the season...

A giant inflatable Tigger... with a Santa hat...  That's what greeted me as I drove down my street after picking up a little more Halloween candy for the impending trick-or-treaters.  That's right, one of my neighbors was out on the beautiful All Hallows Eve PUTTING UP HIS CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS!  And we're not just talking about getting a jump on the lights and then leaving them off until Thanksgiving.  No, he lives almost on the opposite end of the street from me and at any given point you can see his inflatable animal, candy cane sleigh filled, Santa's workshop ferris wheel covered yard.

A few things about this bother me.  First, I love the holiday season as much as the next person, but it's not even Thanksgiving.  On top of that, there is no nativity anywhere in that yard.  Just elves and polar bears and reindeer (oh my!).  Now, I'm not one to go all evangelical but the saying "Let's put the Christ back in Christmas" rings a bell.  Also, Advent, the season that is about to start in the church, is a time of preparation and waiting, so why rush the one time of year that we theologically don't have to.  And this is the theme of today's blog.

With the holiday rush, we tend to lose sight of what Advent is all about.  We get caught up in baking cookies, thinking about turkey, digging through the garage to find decorations and the "Big Toy Book" and forget to prepare.  That is what Advent season is all about.  Preparing our hearts and minds for the birth of Christ.  The symbolic rebirth of our faith comes with all the tinsel and holly and sparkle so it tends to get lost in the shuffle.  With all the loud sights and sounds comes a quiet peep.  A small cry in the wilderness.  A babe comes to bring us closer to God.  The wise men understood this.  That's why they traveled for who knows how long to see this child.  A child who on the outside seemed completely normal, but on the inside was something much more.


My family is big on tradition.  When we were younger, my siblings and I would wait on pins and needles to go get our Christmas tree.  We would watch as our friends' families would put their trees up and hang their stockings and drive our parents crazy with "can we go to the Christmas tree lot NOW?"  As we've gotten older, we've come to understand that the reason we wait until the week before Christmas to get our tree and decorate it has less to do with our busy schedule and more to do with intention.  Preparing the tree is my family's way of being intentional about preparing for Jesus' birth.  As we heat apple cider and tell stories about our family heirlooms around the tree, we are preparing our spirits for something magical.  Not Santa, although we do still receive presents from him every year, even though we are all in our twenties.  We are preparing ourselves for the most spectacular gift ever offered to human kind-- the gift of love in human form, Jesus Christ.


Advent Sunday is the Sunday after Thanksgiving this year.  After your family gathers in the Great Hall to decorate wreaths, eat cookies and make Christmas crafts, spend some time being intentional with your children about what Advent really means.  Take time out of the hustle and bustle to prepare your homes and your hearts for Christ.  Make room for new holiday traditions that stress the importance of being intentional.  Don't rush through things.  Whether it's explaining to your child why baby Jesus is not in the nativity yet or what each candle on the Advent wreath means, slow down and take in what is truly important about the holiday season.


Family.  Intention.  Love.

Goblins and witches and ghouls, OH MY!

Halloween seems like it came a little faster this year and there are a few facts about this holiday that remain constant year to year:

1) It will be cold in Tulsa (thankfully this year we'll avoid the rain).

2) Candy is the only thing on the brain of anyone aged 3-93 (bless teachers' hearts, I don't know how they survive).

3) You are guaranteed to see a baby dressed as a pumpkin, a man dressed as a woman and a kid dressed as a hippie (these are classics.  Always have been, always will be).

Most people see All Hallows Eve as an opportunity to dress up, act silly and go into a sugar induced coma.  I, being the odd little spook that I am, take Halloween very seriously.  I have to watch "It's the Great Pumpkin , Charlie Brown" and listen to Monster Mash and I MUST eat as much candy as I can get my hands on.  But I also love Halloween for another reason.  It is the Eve of one of my favorite church holidays.  I know, Halloween and church, what you talkin' 'bout Ashley? (So maybe I will forgo my plans to be Arnold Jackson this year).

Halloween, or All Hallow's Eve, is the precursor to All Saint's Day, traditionally celebrated by the church on November 1.   In some denominations, such as Catholicism, it is a day for commemorating those who have been beatified as Saints.  For myself growing up in the Episcopal sphere, it was a day spent talking about how each and every one of us, through our daily actions, can be "saints" too.  We sang "This Little Light of Mine" and talked about things that made us saintlike.  As a child, the idea that by not fighting with my siblings and helping do the dishes could make me more saint-like was almost as fascinating as my parents giving me one day a year to eat myself sick on pixi sticks, candy corn and mini snickers.

Think about it.  We talk all the time about treating our neighbors like Christ would, right?  Well, for all intents and purposes Christ is kind of the ultimate Saint.  The dictionary defines a saint as:

1. a person who has died and has been declared a saint by canonization 
2. person of exceptional holiness
3. model of excellence or perfection of a kind; one having no equal

We can all agree that Jesus was a person of exceptional holiness AND a model of excellence or perfection.  Behaving Christlike, or Saintlike, as the case might be, doesn't mean being perfect.  I'm sure Joan of Arc got into fights with her dad when she didn't want to take the trash out.  Being Saintlike is more concerned with going the extra mile for your neighbor and reaching out to those in need.

So Sunday, when the kids are getting in to their fireman, doctor or superhero costumes, talk to them about Hymn #293...

1. I sing a song of the saints of God,
patient and brave and true,
who toiled and fought and lived and died
for the Lord they loved and knew.
And one was a doctor, and one was a queen,
and one was a shepherdess on the green:
they were all of them saints of God--and I mean,
God helping, to be one too.

2. They loved their Lord so dear, so dear,
and his love made them strong;
and they followed the right, for Jesus' sake,
the whole of their good lives long.
And one was a soldier, and one was a priest,
and one was slain by a fierce wild beast:
and there's not any reason, no, not the least
why I shouldn't be one too.

3. They lived not only in ages past,
there are hundreds of thousands still;
the world is bright with the joyous saints
who love to do Jesus' will.
You can meet them in school, or in lanes, or at sea,
in church, or in trains, or in shops, or at tea;
for the saints of God are just folk like me,
and I mean to be one too.

I felt the Earth move...

A little shake.  A little change.  Sometimes that's all it takes to transform a religious experience.  When Church Down Under started a over a year ago, it definitely shook things up.  It has given children a different way to worship than the more traditional forms.  It has given them a place to move a little- to stretch their spiritual legs.

Psychology studies have found that everyone learns differently.  Throughout middle school the "multiple intelligences" theory was pounded in to my head-- bodily-kinesthetic, visual-spacial, linguistic-verbal, logical-mathematical, musical, interpersonal, intrapersonal and naturalistic.  The theory goes that everyone learns differently, sometimes in a combination of these intelligences and if we learn to acknowledge these intelligences in one another, we can understand each other better.

I think the same thing relates to spirituality.  Some people worship more deeply in quiet meditation, some worship through music, others through fellowship.  Thus, it would only make sense that some would worship best through movement.  Church Down Under fills that opportunity for children.  For the Little family, being able to physically relate worship has been an eye-opening experience for their children.

       "The music is a particular highlight of the service because the kids have the chance to move freely in the space, play with noise making toys or instruments, and follow the choreography that each song incorporates.  It’s a joy to see the children engaged in these songs in a way that they wouldn’t have a chance to be in Church upstairs.
  
Another of our favorite practices is the washing of the stones to represent the washing away of our sins.  It has given us a visual example that the children can understand in helping us teach them about God’s forgiveness of our sins.  It encourages participation with by placing the stones into the basin and the act of pouring the water over them which is performed by the kids themselves. 


We have seen a significant increase in the willingness of our shy 5 year-old to participate in all of the wonderful activities that take place at the Church Down Under.  It is a welcoming and comfortable environment that really encourages family growth and sharing.  We simply love it."

So whether we sing, dance, sit silently or play as a way to worship, it all translates the same in God's eyes.

Breaking bread, opening minds...

The first few blogs have been written by Ashley Haggard, with the insights from a few parishioners.  This week, Becky Moseman, Director of Youth and Young Adults, writes about the transforming experience Church Down Under has been for her children.

As a parent I often wonder, “Is my son or daughter really getting anything out of church?” when they surprise me.  When my son was two he made it known that he wanted to take communion.  Not so much in his words; he walked up to the priest like everyone else and wondered why he didn’t get the host, the bread of heaven, that Mommy did.  He’d look at the plate and look at me and I saw the question in his eyes- “why don’t I get any?”  I knew then that my son got what communion was about.  Even adults can get lost in or argue over the theological mystery of the Eucharistic feast, but the main idea that we come together as a community to worship and break bread together, my son understood.  Who am I to intervene in God’s work in my child?  If exclusion is my big beef with other denominations can I really exclude my son from taking communion?  In reflection on this and other children-in-church anecdotes, several thoughts became clear.  Children, much like adults, gravitate to certain parts of worship they find meaningful and going to church means participating in those things.  For some it is music, while others it is the lighting of prayer candles.  For my son, at age two, it was receiving communion.  It was an active part of the service he could physically engage in- we walked up to the front of the church, crossed ourselves, held out our hands, and something special was given to us. 

Our children are spiritual beings.  There is no switch we turn on to activate their curiosity about the world and its creator.  They don’t separate their openness to the Holy Spirit so why should I think they do, or maybe I should ask, why do I?  These little ones want to serve as Christ told us we are supposed to.  Our baptismal covenant asks us to guide our children in their spiritual journeys until they feel they are ready to take over their own spiritual nourishment.  Watching my son, I saw he was already taking responsibility, one step at a time. 

Last year, we started a family oriented service.  Church Down Under as it is called came out of watching children like my son and thinking up ways children could connect to other parts of our liturgy in a tangible way.  From conversations with other parents, I’ve heard repeatedly that these children look forward to and are eager to participate in the service through these hands-on experiences.  Writing a prayer on a card we read aloud for our Prayers of the People and hanging it on our prayer wall or washing away our sins on our confession stones we put in a glass bowl, physically engage all who participate.  The shocking part is that the adults feel they have really been to worship during the service too.  Instead of herding children from under the pew the families are acting out the gospel or figuring out a way to rewrite the story so that the rich man could have been a good neighbor to Lazarus.  I watch my daughter who just turned three to see what is important to her.  She must put her rock in the bowl, and while she was into “The Little Mermaid,” we prayed a lot for “The Sea Witch” who made a lot of bad choices.  Communion is important to my daughter too.  This time I’m not wrestling her in the pew to sit or entertain her with toys brought from home.  Instead I watch her to see the ways in which she is open to Holy Spirit, and that is truly a spiritual experience.